Blog #1

Sydney Horton

Communication 160

Professor Ivey

4 September 2017

“Silence is used as a form of empowerment”

For this weeks blog post, I want to talk about a topic we discussed last class which involved different forms of communicating and how each in can empower you. Everyone communicates differently, and that's what makes us unique, however everyone's different form, gives them advantages and disadvantages. When we were doing the group activity last week, we used yarn to show how a conversation can flourish and all the ways it can go. This activity was very eye opening when you have an intriguing topic. Ours was a little harder to get started because most of us didn’t have a good grasp on the topic but other groups had conversations that could have probably gone on a lot longer. When given a controversial topic with a group of strangers, the conversation doesn’t usually go to far because no one wants to offend another person that they don’t know. That also has to do with the fact that they might have experienced something that's makes it harder for them to be open-minded or easy going about that topic. However, when you are with a group of friends for example, the conversation can go on for awhile and can go in a positive or negative direction. Speaking from personal experience, I find it frustrating to not be able to talk about something because it is a sensitive subject, however I understand it because I wouldn’t want to offend someone that I don’t even know because that can harm a possible relationship that could have formed. I’ve learned to only speak when I really know my stuff. I never talk about something that I can’t back up with proof or evidence because I know I could be wrong. From the group of friends and family I have, I know which ones I can speak to about certain political topics and some that I can’t. The reason that I can’t talk to certain people about specific topics is, sometimes neither of us know enough to speak so boldly about it. This is what really gets to me. I was having a conversation with my boyfriend once about the Black Lives Matter movement and immediately it turned into a fight. Neither of us are African American but that doesn’t mean that we shouldn't care about it. When I saw the conversation was making no dent on him, I decided to stay silent and just let him go on and on about stuff that was factually wrong because I knew he wasn’t going to listen to reason at that point. Then, he says “I feel like you’re being quiet because you don’t actually know the facts to support your argument” to that I said, “no I don’t know everything and I am not going to fight something without the correct information”. I think about this conversation a lot because it showed me two things. 1. I was growing as a mature communicator who could listen and respect someone else's opinion, even if it was different than mine. 2. My boyfriend was being ignorant because instead of admitting he didn’t know enough about the topic, he rambled about false information and did it in a rude way. When I did decide to speak I explained this to him so he could understand that it doesn't show weakness to admit you don’t know enough. Silence is empowerment because by staying quiet during this discussion, I showed that I could be the bigger person and overcome someone else ignorance without getting into a raging fight. My silence has presented itself in other discussions and the outcome is usually the same: while someone is too worried about sounding dumb that they have to force their facts (even if they are wrong) on someone else and I can let them speak before I tell them was true. By staying quiet, I am admitting to not knowing everything in a respectful way. Of course, there are many instances where silence is not the best option but it is a situational tactic that works when it can. To me, my silence is also a form of my open-mindedness because I am allowing the other person to speak their part so I can learn from it as well. Maybe I was wrong about something I was convinced I was right on and by really listening to them, I can alter my argument and opinion to come across as neutral to them as well. I have attached a link that elaborates on why silence can be a form of power because I feel that there is still a lot to learn about it and its advantages.All in all, I’ve always been  fairly quiet person and sometimes it's not a good quality, but for the most part, I am proud of myself when I can realize when it is time to speak up and when it is time to stay quiet and listen.

http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/the-power-of-silence/