Blog #3 by Valentine Lacaze: family communication

The way we look at family depending on the culture is very interesting to me. In today’s class we discussed the family myth and vision of family in the US, the vision and role in families are very different than from where I’m from. France being also a western culture some ideas are still the same, but ever since the end of the WWII there are a lot of things that have changed in France, especially in the role of women. I would say even after WWI, as women were left to run the country while the mens were out at wars, it became more and more common after to have women working as well as their husband. After WWII, a lot people moved from country to country in Europe and France had an important immigration from Italy, Spain and Portugal. My family came to France from Spain, mostly because of the dicature and fascism and so my great grandmother, as well as grandmother always worked. My grandmother got her high school degree at a time when only 18% of the population was graduating from high school, and even pursue a biology major and became assistant for a veterinarian. My mother always worked as well and manage to be really present for both my brother and I. That being said,ever since I’m little I had great example of everyone sharing role and task at home, and my father never sitted watching my mother cook or something. He would always come help, or do the dishes and made me and my brother involved in the domestic tasks. My grandmother divorced when my dad was a teenager and because she always worked and had a good job she was able to keep up with her quality of life. Living with only his mother, my dad also learn how to help at home and do things that would be seen in American culture as “women task”.

French and american support system are very different, but I often hear the argument of people having special connection with their mother because they stay at home, or how it’s nice to have your mother every part of your day, but I really think it’s all about perception and culture. I’ve grew up having a nanny, then going to daycare and to pre school and I still have a very close relationship with my parents. Looking back, I think it was very good for my growing and development to have social experience that early in my life, and I think I had a great balance of representation in my early years. I also was very fortunate to have my grand parents living close to my parents, because they helped my parents a lot to take care of us. My grandfather made me start golf and would always drive me around to practice when my parents were working, and my grandmother would always helped out with dinner, or taking us from school if my parents couldn’t.

I’ve always seen family as a collaboration between people where everyone helps and bring something special. We shouldn’t do something because we are a certain gender, like cooking if you are a women, but because we like it. The vision of family is always changing and evolving, and nowadays what really matter the most is to create a healthy and safe environment for every member.