March Blog Post

     So as we come to the end of March and the end of the semester overall i had to think about what i felt was most important for this blog post. I stopped for a bit and pondered the idea and i landed on the idea of "the other" and the importance of this idea. The other is basically understanding that we will never have a complete understanding of people from other groups or cultures. We may have a great understanding that is very empathetic and educated but if we do not belong to that group or culture we cannot completely understand. I believe this is very important as a society and i think communication is a great way to bridge the gaps we have but we have to understand that we cannot understand.
     In our country today we hear a lot of talk about oppressed groups and a need for a shift towards a more wide spread open minded attitude. I agree completely with these claims. I feel like everyone should share equal rights because that is what makes us different than the countries and cultures we seem to resent. I believe that communication is a great tool that should be used to help everyone get on the same page. Unfortunately i do not see quality communication being used when these topics come up. This past election made this very clear and i believe that it also framed our country to be a bunch of weak and stubborn sub groups that all seem to want to fight before they communicate. To me it looks like a bar fight that gets physical first and then after the violence stops they begin to argue. it just seems backwards and extra volatile. These sub groups can be whatever you want them to be. They can be racial, gender, social economic status, political party or whatever we want it to be but the list is long and separated. Now i want to make it clear that i am not saying that a majority doesn't exist because it clearly does. What i am trying to highlight is this need to gather in groups based on one or two small characteristics or opinions and i believe that is doing a lot of harm. Instead of people looking to find a team to play for i think we should all remember that we are on the same team. We always hear claims like "make America great again" versus "not my president" or black lives matter versus all lives matters. WHO CARES? why is it one side against another instead of just us as Americans.
    I think about this when i think about the other. I am a middle class straight white American man and i will never say i know what its like to be a woman or to be black or be gay but that doesn't mean i wont sit and listen to someone that is in one of those groups. I would love to know more about those experiences and try my best to understand their thoughts, feelings and experiences. I always appreciate people from another group having an open minded and vulnerable conversation about these topics with me. that being said i know i wont know exactly what its like no matter what i do and i have to be honest, i am not interested in having a perfect understanding. It is not my experience so i haven't earned being an expert in their lives. But the problem i see is people do not want to listen to people that identify with another group. I have had plenty of people tell me that i can never understand something because i am a white man. I see no difference there than if i told an African american that they can't understand or participate in this conversation because they are black (which i would never say nor do i think). the point being is we should all try to understand each other and we should all welcome others to learn about us in a safe and productive way. So why are people so quick to shut down the opinions of others but then get mad when people do it in return? I believe that it all comes down for a lack of communication skills and high emotional states. If people could take the idea of the other with open arms and have the same practice reciprocated to them i believe we would all be much better off. This is why i believe "the other" is so important.