Carli Testerman
Most Important
Sentence
“As with each new place at which I
had arrived in my life, I felt like a square peg in a world of round holes( 55).”
Carlos Andrés Gómez said this in his book Man
Up: Reimagining Modern Manhood. This quote is the most important sentence I
have read so far this semester because in my culture, my world, this is a
feeling that is attached to almost everyone I know. My culture is college
students, kids ranging from 18-22, all on our own for the first time. Entering
freshman year is one of the biggest life changes young adults go through, a
life event that occurred only a year ago for me. Even if you are from the area
where you attend college, you are still entering into a world you’ve never come
close to before. It is completely different from high school in every way
possible. For most kids, you’re living on your own with someone you’ve never
met, you are responsible for making it to class everyday, for making sure you
eat healthy meals three times a day, you are responsible for your own life for
the first time. There is no parent watching over you and guiding you through
each day, there’s no principal that will have a talk with you if you miss more
than a few classes. No wonder we all feel the same way Gómez does. We have no
clue what we’re doing. We’re square pegs in a world of round holes.
This concept is something I have
discussed with my fellow students and friends many times. It has been in
different words but concept is still the same. When I think of these past conversations
I am reminded of a concept we learned in class, active listening. Active
listening is understanding what the speaker is saying, using empathy to relate
and reflect on the emotions being shown, and being able to paraphrase and
respond to what they say. Throughout these conversations with other college
students about how I feel out of place and like I don’t fit into this new
world, I can see them concentrating on what I’m saying and relating my feelings
to their own emotions. It allows us to connect through a common feeling, which
is how I know that this out of place feeling Gómez discusses is something
common among college kids. Hannah Steinhardt states in her article in the New
York Times, “Throughout
the year, I wondered how it was possible that, after an entire year of anticipation
and preparation for college, I had arrived on campus seemingly unprepared.” She
speaks of the transition from high school to college and the confusion that you
can never seem to prepare for when arriving at college for the first time. Both
Gómez and Steinhardt speak of this uncertainty that creeps up on them, but what
is its purpose?
Its
purpose is motivation. No one wants to feel like a square peg in a world of
round holes. No one wants to feel like they don’t belong. So we do something to
change it. The feeling of uncertainty that seems to infect everyone at one
point in their life, motivates them to find themselves. Some join clubs,
whether it is religious or recreational. Some join a fraternity or sorority and
are instantly given a group of friends that will accept you and drive you. Some
get a job or volunteer and meet amazing new people in the process. This feeling
takes us out of our comfort zone and forces us to branch out into the world. It
may take months or it may take days, but that feeling of not fitting in is only
temporary. You just haven’t found your new place in the world yet. That is
something that the people around me and myself are doing in this very moment.
We are all searching for our place in this great big world.
Works Cited
Gómez, Carlos. Man
Up: Reimagining Modern Manhood. Penguin Publishing Group. November 5, 2013.
Print.
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