From the reading, Fear Beneath the Façade

  For the month of February I chose to write about the publication by Andreas Gomez. After reading the story it made me think about what it means to be a man, a father. The story talks about how men are not allowed to show any signs of emotion be afraid. I find this true today.  The male is supposed to be the tough one. For Andreas, he was wanting to be tough like his dad seemed to be. I feel that the men are tough on the outside yet soft on the inside. From the reading it made me think about how my kids look at me. Do they see the tough and rough father figure or do they see me as the loving and caring dad? The reading made me think of my expectation towards my kids. I hope that they can see me as the caring loving dad. The story made me think about my own marriage and how I am committed to staying with my wife even through the difficult times. There are times where I have thought about divorce like Andreas’s dad. But the thought of devastating my kids makes me more committed to my wife and family. It made me sad reading about the dysfunction of the family. It is not the way a family should be.

How to the kids react to the dysfunction.  Kids are resilient. They are tough and get through the tough times through the support of the family. I think that it is important for the kids to have a mom and dad.  The stable home helps provide a safe environment for the children.

  The reading stated that Andreas’s had his dad on pedestal before the divorce. He was the kids He Man superman. This is what I hope that my own kids think of me. I want them to look up to me.

  The divorce tainted Andreas’s relationship with his dad. The end of the story he faces the fears of being a husband and a dad. The fears are true for me I have fears of being the father and being the husband. I am like Andreas.  I have the strength to make it through the fears.

February Blog Post #2

Carly Whittaker

Christina Ivey

Comm 160

February Blog Post

            Out of everything we have gone over and read about this month chapter 6 of the book really spoke to me. Identity and different perceptions are everywhere, and page 100 explains identity, perception, and communication very well. I have two specific quotes form this chapter that spoke to me. The first one is from Chuck Palahniuk, “Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everyone I’ve ever known” (p.100). I also like the question the author asks on page 99, “Who am I?” In this chapter the author explains identity as what shapes a person through culture, social, and political factors. They want to know what types of experiences people have had and how those experiences shape us. The author also talks about perceptions, which are how a person sees the world. A person can and is influenced by different aspects of the world and it helps to shape them in certain ways. I like how the author uses a real life experience of a young African American women and how she got to where she is today. For me I have had a different life experience for sure and many other people will have very different life experiences. Like take for instance my parents have been a big influence on my life. They have helped me with money, school, and have kept me on track all of these years. Sports have also helped to shape me with working with many different teams and having to come together as one to reach a common goal. I have also been shaped by the many different jobs I have worked and the co-workers I have met. Some later on became like family and some were even family. I would also say that school has helped shaped me into the person I am today as well. Just learning what to do in the classroom and helping me get the necessary skills I will need to succeed. Each of these experiences have influenced, helped, and shaped me into the young women I am today. I would say I identify myself as different because many different people have influenced me throughout my life. I would have to agree that it is hard to truly think about and truly figure out who I am based on the different perceptions, who I identify myself as, and how I communicate those ideas. Without identification we wouldn’t have a communicative idea or perceptions. Chapter 6 has really got me thinking about where I fall in this idea of identification. It is an idea that I will continue to think about and hopefully one day I will be able to figure out the true reason of who I truly am!

February Post-Learning to Survive

    The sentence that stuck out to me the most was “...know that survival is not an academic skill. It is learning how to stand alone, unpopular and sometimes reviled, and how to make common cause with those others identified as outside the structures in order to define and seek a world in which we can all flourish” from “The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle The Master's House”. What the author means from this quote is that survival is not something that can be taught or learned properly from a lecture or taking notes, it is something that you must learn on your own as you go through life. Through doing this it will not make you the most popular and you may be on your own but you will meet people who are also outcast and you can come together to break down social barriers that will help benefit the world as a whole. By not expressing any of these traits one is merely on the level of existing in a physical space. By learning how to stand up for yourself and others similar who may be outcast you are entering into the stage of survival.

    A current example of this would be in this past month when President Trump lifted the transgender bathroom law set in place by the Obama administration. This bill is very controversial but also very important to others. People who are transgender or in support of that community have been vocal on social media platforms. In the comments section they often receive a lot of hate but at the same time even though they may stand alone this allows them to connect with other people who feel the same way about this issue so the can come together to help make change happen. Caitlyn Jenner has been influential for this community because she is a celebrity. At times she has had to stand alone and has been extremely unpopular and hated by many people but at the same time she was able to use her public image to reach out to other people who feel the same way. In doing so she has not only helped the transgender community but also has learned how to survive. She is able to be happy and confident with herself as her new gender instead of living in fear and denial.

    This is important today because the fight for marginalized communities isn't over and it probably will never be. Even today we see discrimination towards black people and women even though women's suffrage and the civil rights era is over. Standing up for what you believe in, especially when its controversial, is extremely difficult and it takes a ton of courage but it is an extremely liberating feeling once you do. Also it can help bring you closer to people who feel the same way but are also scared they are alone in their fight. This reminds me of Rosa Parks, if definitely took a lot of courage to do what she did but she set an example for us all even if we are not black or in the exact situation she was. Although she was not the first person to resist, she has pioneered this era and is considered “mother of the freedom movement”. It takes more people who are willing to stand alone to bring about change for marginalized communities but once they do we can finally move on from just existing.

Genderless, Not Sexless Feb Blog Post

Gender is a topic that has seized headlines heavily in the past couple of years. People throughout the nation have taken a stance against preconceived gender norms fighting for their right to express themselves freely. The UCLA speech given by Stacey watched in our class was a topic that has stuck with me for quite awhile now. As she talks throughout the video with emphasis on the little boys words, “she is a girl that is a man”, she puts societies cage on gender on blast. As the child stares at her confused as to whether she is a male or female she brings up the point “I wonder if he will grow up to be the man his mom thinks him to be”. Have any of us really grown up to be the exact version our parents or even ourselves expected? The real question to ask here is how have these gender norms already taken such a heavy constraint on the mind of a young child. These societal norms are very problematic as they subject a person to be one-dimensional and can lead them to life full of subordinate social roles. The Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy released an Feminist article touching on the many oppressive results faced when gender norms completely dictate how men and women should behave. With feminism being a hot topic throughout our class one statement from this outside article really stood out to me stating “Feminism should aim to create a “genderless (though not sexless) society, in which one's sexual anatomy is irrelevant to who one is, what one does, and with whom one makes love”. Individuals who don’t necessarily understand feminism’s ultimate goal can often place a negative connotation with the word. I really liked the the stress on how one’s anatomy is irrelevant to what they do or who they are. Why should it matter if a man is feminine and why should the word feminine only link to female? Masculinity and femininity should be gender fluid and allow people to have the versatility they want. Because these gender norms are socially produced they can be changed. All different cultures interpret bodies differently and lay norms on the bodies of their people. As we continue to fight for our freedom of expression I hope we can all stand against this socially imposed rending of the sexes and express our masculinity and femininity in any ways that we want.

Mikkola, Mari. "Feminist Perspectives on Sex and Gender." Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy. Stanford University, 12 May 2008. Web. 01 Mar. 2017.

Feb. Blog Post

 Overall, this has been an interesting month for this class. I have enjoyed hearing the perspectives of others and reading the writings of so many strongly opinionated people. The one I enjoyed the most would have to be Lorde. The reason I enjoyed this the most is because of the honest use of anger.

 Lorde's background is interesting because she is a black woman and a lesbian. She has faced more than one type of discrimination because of this and it is understandable how this made her mad. I like how she is honest with her use of anger. She describes how she used to fear that anger but it taught her nothing so now she just uses it. She is using that anger to respond to racism. Lorde writes, "Women responding to racism means women responding to anger; the anger of exclusion, of unquestioned privilege, of racial distortions, of silence, ill-use, stereotyping, defensiveness, misnaming, betrayal, and co-optation." For me this was a powerful quote. It clearly breaks down what causes the anger from racism and that by women responding to racism it means they are responding to the feeling they get from these actions.

 I feel like this is important because we see it a lot in the news lately. With all of the marches or riots or gatherings. People are clearly angry because of some social injustice but you don't really see the idea of anger expressed. It is clear people are angry but no one is expressing it in the way Lorde does. She does it in a clear and out loud manner. I think it is a good way to show emotion when you are trying to make change. This is why I felt like this was the most interesting part of February.

February Blog Post

To me the most important sentence from the readings is from Lorde’s “The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master’s House” is: “What woman here is so enamored of her own oppression that she cannot see her heelprint upon another woman’s face?” I think we live in a world where this question is ever prevalent. No matter who we are, each of us have our own soapboxes upon which we stand. Sometimes our deeply rooted causes prevent us from seeing opportunities to help others in need. There’s a certain amount of interconnectedness that must exist within minority cultures in order for them to survive oppression and hegemony.

When minorities oppress other minorities, their movements tend to lose credibility and support from other minority groups. Since minority groups understand the thumb of oppression, they can offer to one another an empathy that the majority cannot simple muster up. When they unite their voices, their power is much more easily recognized. Let’s consider third-wave feminism as an example. Before third wave feminism (the time Lorde primarily was in), the movement tended to be a bit exclusionary. First and second wave feminisms in their dominant forms did not represent alternative sexualities or identities. This left individuals like Lorde feeling ostracized from the feminist community at large (though she was inarguably a part). Third-wave feminism sought to be a more inclusive group. Men are encouraged to join the feminist movement. The LGBT community has become a major ally to feminism in its various forms. The inclusiveness of feminism in the third wave has created a much more accessible and formidable movement against hegemony and oppression. We mustn’t get so entrenched in our own personal battles that we fail to connect to those who are in need of our aid. What good is equality for one if there is not equality for all? The battle for equality will never have a predestined point of success. Because of that, we cannot reach the mystical point of acceptance at the cost of those who do not yet have it.

February Blog Post

I really enjoyed reading the article Man Up by Gomez this past week because it talks about how men have to have this persona of being manly and not showing emotions. Throughout history we have seen that men put on this front and have to act tough to show others that they are strong and doing well in life. Since talking about it in class I have noticed my surroundings more and listened to men talk near me and I see that they feel they have to be this type of way to the world. I do not think this is just and American thing for men, I think that all over the world men are created to look a certain way and act a certain way. For women, we also have these stereotypes and ideas about how we are supposed to act and behave. Communication and culture have shown us that no matter where we are there will always be these norms and ideas of how each sex should act, but I have noticed that in today’s society that norm is starting to change.

In an article called “The New Dad” it talks about how these norms are changing and evolving that it is okay for the dad to stay at home with the children and the mom can go to work and be the breadwinner. But the article also states that people applaud dads when they take time off of work to go do things with their children and how they are idolized as a great dad for being involved, but moms are still looked down upon for taking time off of work to help their kids. It is so interesting to me to see how society categorizes these everyday moves into what makes up a good father or mother and a bad one.

I think this ties back into what we were talking about in class because society and each culture has its own interpretation of what it is like to live in todays world and how to go about it. Every culture has its own unique way of living and going about life so we cannot say that one person or group does something better or worse than others.

URL link to “The New Dad”:

https://blackboard.boisestate.edu/bbcswebdav/pid-4454870-dt-content-rid-22108424_1/courses/117315303COMM48100115517GENDER480007/Harrington%202011.pdf