Growing
up as a super energetic kid not being able to sit still, my mom always focused
on the aspect of focusing and listening. According to Chapter 4, “Compassionate
Critical Listening”, Chris Rea states listening takes active attention and
focus. I completely agree with this because listening takes effort and takes
energy in my opinion. Every kid has shaken their head or have mumbled yes to
the parents when they were trying to tell them something. This is because they
were hearing their parents but technically not listening. So, in the end the
kid usually does not recall much of the conversation later. To be an active
lister you must be engaged and think critically about what the person you are
talking about is saying. Not only is it respectful to listen to somebody when
they talk, you could even get something positive out of each experience. For
example, I was talking to somebody I usually see around at the gym and most of
the time I don’t truly listen because I personally saw this guy as a so called,
“talker”, but after listening and engaging in a conversation, I learn a lot
about this guy and realized we truly had a lot in common. Now till this day
this guy is not only a friend, but a great mentor to myself. I think the power
of listening is profound, I’m happy my mother worked hard with me all those
years, because it has truly helped me to be successful and must importantly, it
has allowed me to become a caring and genuine person.
Chris Rea states that are ability to listen isn’t
something we just develop it’s a result of our cultural and social
surroundings. I could see this playing a powerful affect in our human development.
I’m a strong believer in what you know is what you do, in other words, the way
you were raised or the experiences in your past have shaped who you are today.
I think this is also true for listening because if anyone grew up in an environment
where good communication skills such as listening was practiced, chances are you
will grow up to have good listening skills.
Chris Rea also says you use “…various modes of listening
for various listening situations.” A good listener can adapt to the circumstances
he is put into. No two situations you encounter are completely the same you must
adjust and change for the given situation. For example, being in a relationship
calls on different listening skills than if you hanging out with some friends.
You use different strategies in both, in a relationship you might be more open
and caring but with your friends you might be more care free or in a way not as
serious. Listening I have found out is so much more complex than I have ever
realized, there are many aspects that come along with it. Yet, listening is
crucial to communication and is truly a vital part of life.
